I was revising my author bio when I suddenly stopped.
“Author, Teacher, Caregiver…”
Wait.
I’m not a caregiver anymore.
I have identified as my daughter’s caregiver for almost 30 years. But she moved out to live in a group home where other people care for her. She has new caregivers. Professional caregivers. Therefore, I am no longer a caregiver.
Do I still have an extra role in her life other than “Mom”?
If so, what?
I no longer care for Rhia’s daily needs. I don’t cook her meals anymore, or clean her room, brush her hair, help her dress and drive her places. She tells other people how to help her, finally gaining more indepence from me, her mom.
But I do more for her than other parents of young adults. I still coordinate her healthcare (with help from the group home’s nurse and social worker). I manage her Social Security benefits and any bills that may come. I buy her vitamins and replace her clothing when needed. I am still her ASL interpreter when she needs communication support. And I still fight for her rights whenever necessary.
Everything a parent should do, right?
Should I just write Mom in my bio. Super Mom?
No… Advocate.
I am Rhia’s mom, but I am also her Advocate. I work to ensure she gets absolutely everything she needs in order to thrive. No matter the need or how long it might take, I won’t give up. I know the laws and policies that protect her rights and I know who to call if I can’t find a solution.
After erasing “Caregiver” from my bio, I typed “Advocate.”
It feels right.